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Once upon a time, I was a broken heart-ed, jaded-waiter who moved from Chicago to the Bay Area with the dream of becoming a professional musician. I made it a goal to create a sustainable life with music. In just a few years, I made that happen. Now, I’m expanding that goal to building a life where I can consistently create MY music for those who wanna get weird with me.

Greetings, salutations, and gesticulations! My name is Jefferson Bergey and I’m a professional musician in Oakland, California. Which KIND OF musician really depends on the day….

I make a living performing songs from the last 75 years of popular music with multiple sought-after private event and party bands. ( Lucky Devils Band , Ivy Hill Entertainment )

With Lucky Devils Band, I’ve performed hundreds of events all over Northern California, Tahoe, Hawaii, and even as far as Barcelona, and Cabo. The band and I were the cover story of the San Francisco Chronicle's Sunday arts and entertainment supplement, Datebook.

I’m a teacher at Starland School of Music . I’m the voice of Gregg Allman in Freestone Peaches. I take pride in being a musical chameleon and my office is different every day.

Meanwhile, the music that I write and perform…is NOT for everyone! When I’m not performing in a family-friendly environment, I take great delight in participating in shows that could very well be considered, well, family-UNfriendly.

With a flair for musical theater, I write songs that are built using the blueprints of jazz, blues, pop, folk, bluegrass, and rock, but break form with lyrical content that is smutty, twisted, foul, juvenile, and just plain SILLY. I employ polite vulgarity, or smut with a smile. I perform this unique genre that I call (Immature) Adult Contemporary in variety shows, podcasts, story-telling events, and house concerts as a solo artist around the Bay Area and beyond. You could call me a coffee shop singer-songwriter…if that coffee shop also sold sex toys and sativa gummy bears. My songs are definitely not for the very young, the very old, or the very conservative. At least they haven’t been so far!

Sometimes I write songs about some of my other obsessions including Mystery Science Theater 3000, 80's pop culture, and being an insufferable phan. Again, NOT for everyone.

Most notably over the past four years I’ve become a regular performer in San Francisco's Bawdy Storytelling for which I write custom songs for creator and host, Dixie De La Tour. With the show I’ve performed at Punchline SF over two consecutive years for SF Sketchfest and traveled to Chicago, Seattle and even the most unlikely venues such as the JCC of San Francisco. My music has been regularly featured on the award-winning Bawdy Storytelling Podcast and has appeared on Kevin Allison's wildly popular RISK! podcast.

Over the past two years, I’ve maintained a weekly, Monday night residency at Scopo Divino in the Pacific Heights neighborhood of San Francisco. This beautiful, award-winning wine bar is a classy place that hosts my classless show called Risqué which is a two-hour interactive experience featuring my dirty songs, random audience-inspired covers, games, bells, whistles, and on occasion, some very special guests.

I already have a full, musical life. But I feel like I have much more to offer. That’s why, I’ve started an account on Patreon.

If I had a nickel for every person that has said to me “You should write a song about (insert weird idea here)”, I would be nickel-rich. So, I figured that Patreon could be a great way to stack up the nickels to bring some of these silly songs to life. I already have dozens of tunes that I’ve performed at Bawdy Storytelling that I would love to flesh-out in the studio with professional-level production but this takes lots and lots of nickels. I’m still trying to figure out how many. I struggle with Math.

My music is not for everybody. My music will not change the world, bring people together, motivate any sort of political change, or anything lofty/delusional like that. And honestly, that is FINE BY ME.

I’ve started this Patreon account because I’m trying to create original content and entertain people. Maybe that’s you. (Maybe so, maybe not.) In the past, I’ve just sat on my creative ideas. Now I’m gonna pull these ideas straight out of my….heart, and deliver them straight to YOU.

As a creator, here’s what I’m going to do:

*Create custom songs, sometimes directly inspired by my patrons..

*Produce videos of original songs, covers, and collaborations with other Bay Area artists, along with the re-launch of 'Bergey and the Buddha'

*Perform interactive and private shows exclusively for patrons…

*Record a Holiday EP and a new EP of songs I’ve performed at past Bawdy Storytelling shows with full band arrangements..

*Wash your feetsies and drive you to Firenze. (Currently not a tiered reward, please inquire within)

If you’re even CONSIDERING throwing some nickels at me every month, I can’t thank you enough. If you do become a Patron, I WILL thank you so much that you may scold me and say ENOUGH. Although, I’m pretty good at reading social cues, so it probably won't get to that point.

Either way, thanks for your time, tolerance, and consideration.

((((gong noise)))


Or this: "Shower Time: A pre-emptive apology for the music of Jefferson Bergey